Micro-update

Just taking a way-too-frequent break from writing to jot down things that are funny, but probably won't make their way into the story... or at least not until I desperately, desperately need filler.

Quotes from the last week or so:

"I think there's string behind that van." -- Randy, during a tailgate party at my cousin's wedding, nearly encouraging the ring bearer to play in traffic.

"Rollin'... Rollin'... Rollin'..." -- my contribution to the Island version of "Proud Mary" at karaoke.

"Lookout for Julie the Stoolie!" -- me to Ryan in The 'Nish, after a few too many Keith's. (PS -- what about Lester the Chesterfield?)

"Oh, hello Sabrina!" -- Rhea to the world's weirdest waitress.

"Wow, that killed the mood in here. Just like after daddy hit mommy at the dinner table." -- Dane Cook, the funniest man alive. From the CD "Retaliation."

"And so we did it on the floor, it wasn't me, and we did it on the counter, it wasn't me." -- Mikhail, from St. Petersberg, performing Shaggy at karaoke without ever hearing the original.

"I'm the grand captain master of exaggeration." -- Me. It's true.

"Well, are yuz any good?" -- Ry Guy to the 16-year-old girls who came to our door on a bottle drive.

"One of them was staring at our candle the whole time." -- Me, after the girls left.